Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

Can you share any "backstage pass" experiences you have had at concerts?

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

Why do men suck dick? Me, I can't get enough

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

Which country has the best and strictest legal system in the world?

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

Why are American university students fine with sharing a room?

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

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I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I see through liars

Why do Christians think voting for Trump is any better than voting for Kamala Harris?

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I know who the president of Turkey really is

Is it still wrong to spread misinformation even if it's only to troll people rather than harming them?

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

My ex moved on so fast. How can I overcome the pain?

I can count

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

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I actually pay taxes

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t buy bullshit

Do very hot men ever feel attracted to an ugly woman? Why?

I don’t cotton to rapists

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

What made you recently say to yourself, “Wait. Really?”

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

Why do people think Justin Bieber is worse than Joseph Stalin?

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I have a reading level above third grade

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I can read

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I have complete contempt for fakery

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I understand how hurricane paths work

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability